She Teaches Me

I always knew she was special, that she had gifts and talents, but I never knew she would cause me to examine myself, the way I must when I'm with her.

Being the eldest of three daughters, she is a mirror of me in so many ways. I look into the mirror of her heart and thank the Lord for the positive qualities that are also mine but swallow hard when I observe the ones I've worked to banish generationally. Oooh, how these ones stare back at me boldly, mockingly. Not that they've reared their ugly heads in this precious girl, but glimpses are there and this is why I come before the throne for my children and myself daily. When I recognize a negative trait I remind her that she has younger siblings to which she must be an example. I chide her and say that we don't want them picking up this characteristic. The other day, after thinking about how she might unknowingly pass along something negative, she asked me, "Where did I get it from?" Then HE reminds me that in my brokenness, I'm given the grace to lead this daughter to Him. I grimace. I ache to know Him more passionately so I only pass her the baton of righteousness and wisdom.

My beautiful, responsible, loving, intelligent girl, you thrive on deep, emotional connections with your family. You seek justice. You are more affectionate and thoughtful than I ever was. As much as I see myself mirrored in you, you are a unique creation of God. I couldn't be more proud of the girl you're becoming. I'm so thankful for the way you open my eyes to new ideas, ways of looking at the world and people. I'm excited to see where God is going to lead you as you grow. I am so blessed to be your Mom and I will continue to examine myself as you teach me who God is.