Big Baby

She keeps reminding us that she's nearly an adult, but we don't believe her. We see a toddler when she turns and flashes a cheeky grin. We see a little girl aching to become a ballerina when she twirls into the living room. We see a child who's just trying out her new bicycle when she sits all big in that driver's seat in the truck. Nope, we're not convinced. She's still young and dependent and just dreaming of being grown up. It can't really be happening, can it? She turned 17. But that's just a number. Our big baby still likes being carried and we choose to disagree that this kid, of whom we are so proud, is nearly an adult. 

Happy birthday, Big Baby. We love you :)

Day Thirty: Releasing Love

We bite into our meals but Julie's talking a blue streak and forgets she has a gourmet burger in front of her. She wonders why her heart loves her little girl but she's not so emotional that it's wrecking her. She asks, shouldn't I be wrecked?  My husband and I remind Julie that she's experiencing an answer to prayer. She let go of Alexandria so that a beautiful couple could raise her daughter in a godly home and give Ali everything she would need for life. That resonated with this young birth-mother. 

We got to look after her in my home today because adoptive momma, Alicia is amazing like that. Alexandria turned two and I took photos of the one I'd caught at birth and cut her cord and sang "Jesus Loves Me" to in those first minutes. I'm so thankful to be a part of this unfolding story of  this releasing kind of  love.

The Clock Will Strike Midnight...

I will dance with Cinderella while she is here in my arms,

 Cuz I know something the prince never knew. 

I will dance with Cinderella;

 I don't wanna miss even one song, 

Cuz all too soon the clock will strike midnight... 

and she'll be gone.

Steven Curtis Chapman 

Cinderella jewelry box from Mama

She turned sixteen and I became hyper-aware that my time with her is slipping through my fingers. Moments of tension or simply busy days cause me to wince a little more because life as I know it with my big girl is fleeting. As God redeems the time and I focus carefully on intentionally loving this kiddo just as she needs me to, her memories of home will be sweet. He'll use the questionable parenting moments for her good as she gives herself to Him and understands He has a purpose for her. His protection and provision for her will come to light in her mind. All of our mistakes will fade as she recognizes the brightness of God's perfect parenting like a screen in front of it all. I don't have to fear that in my humanness I've "spoiled" her, even though I lay my head down sometimes and regret that conversation, that allowance I shouldn't have given in to. I don't have to regret when I was too harsh. He forgives, she forgives, I am free to begin again and she will use it all to become an even more fabulous person.

The faces she makes me do!

Our prayers for her will and are coming to fruition and this girl, this young woman, is teaching me what it's like to love and let go. Man, can she really be an extension of me and yet be so very different? Her own person? I've denied it for so long. She's all God's and I'm thankful to have the privilege of watching Him raise her along the way, grateful He forgives my errors and celebrates when I'm in line with His will. 

Now a recipient of Blessing Day, instead of one of my givers :)

She's got her own style.

Finally reading the letter she's waited for since she was a tiny girl.

"Aunt" Linette wrote it for her about when I was 16 and she couldn't open it until that very birthday! Linette was my best friend in highschool and she knew a lot about me. She felt Meg needed to know that me :)  A very precious keepsake!

Family tradition on birthday nights: ice cream at Yogurty's

A few of my kiddo's friends, who happened to be standing around after our morning service. 

They call her "the Albino" ;)

God bless you this year, my ever-loved oldest girl. You make me so thankful to be your momma. Truly, you teach me how to stay on my toes and how to relax and let things go. I love you and pray this is your best year yet!

The Work Of His Fingers

When I consider Your heavens, the work of Your fingers,

the moon and the stars which You have ordained,

what is man that You are mindful of him, and the son of man that You visit him?

 For You have made him a little lower than the angels,

and You have crowned him with glory and honour.

You have made him to have dominion over the works of Your hands;

You have put all things under his feet,

all sheep and oxen--even the beasts of the field,

 

 the birds of the air,

 

and the fish of the sea that pass through the paths of the seas.

O Lord, our Lord, how excellent is Your name in all the earth! Psalm 8:3-9 

 

Taking in the wonder of God's creation at Ripley's Aquarium in Toronto.

 

As Quiet As A Dragonfly

We call her the "bag lady" because everywhere we go (even in the woods), she carries a purse or bag of some sort. Inside are her "quiet items" for which she doesn't explain or seem to care if anyone notices. She has a purpose for them but she may or may not use them on any given jaunt. I think it comforts her to have her "itty-bitties" with her, just in case.

 

I photographed my girl as she wrote something in her notebook up on top of that rock and I photographed a dragonfly silently alighting on a stalk. Molly turned twelve last month and her gentle, beautiful, quiet way reminds me of that tiny, winged creature.

 

 

Molly, we love you. You are ever capturing us with your intriguing, thoughtful manner. Yes, you can be boisterous and energetic like your siblings, but it's not the norm. You are growing up so lovely and we're proud of you. May this year be filled with amazing growth and may you always hear God's still, small voice in your own quietness.

Emily's Storybook Birthday Party

She loves books and told me she can't put one down until she's finished it, which leads to late night readings. And so, it seemed appropriate that her birthday party would emphasize this love. Her guests arrived dressed as storybook characters and she, herself, as Red Riding Hood.

Her friend, Kyla, (and her mom) gave Emily a most special surprise--a cake and cupcakes designed perfectly for the theme.

That book is a Rise Krispie square!

just because my girl loves horses :)

 

They were so lovely, I didn't want the kids to eat them! 

 

 

Thanks, Gillian!

Oh, hello, Raggedy Ann. 

Laura Ingalls Wilder is excited about what Jasmine, of Aladdin, has given the birthday girl. 

 

She loves it. 

 

"Jasmine's" lovely outfit was straight from India (for real :)

In fact, she loved all her books (and a couple of movies and gift cards to a nearby bookstore). 

 

 

 

 

 

 A Rapunzel birthday card was an excellent choice!

 Her cousin, Eden, wrote her own book for Emily!

 It is all about the mischievous adventures of two little princesses. Hmmm... who could that be?

 Eden, or should I say, Cinderella, is proud of her work.

Our storybook characters were well-dressed. This one was made by her mom to suit the cover of the book she gave Emily. Perfect!

 Katniss (cake-giver, listens intently to the story read by Molly to the group of girls).

 Also in attendance, Kiki, Sully and an unnamed slave girl.

 

 

Emily, you are nearly nine years old (early party)! You've always wished you could fly but, you did, my little girl, you flew in time and became a young lady when I blinked. God bless you, sweet, helpful girl. Mommy and Daddy love you so much!