Wednesday, January 19, 2011

His Answer For My Struggle

Waves of helplessness wash over me when I think about creating and keeping habits--good ones. There are so many I do keep but those don't seem to hold any weight with me right now. The ones that stand out, the ones I desperately need to introduce myself to in order to make this life much smoother, their lack screams at me daily. The small, seemingly insignificant, regular habits I desire, evade me somehow. I talk about them, pray about them, list-write them, try them out from time to time but I can't capture them and cage them as my own.
I cried in the shower the other day because He spoke to me (I seem to do my best listening there.). The words were so clear, painful, and good:
"Obedience. Obedience is the only way to begin and maintain those beautiful habits."
Really, Lord? It's obedience I struggle with?
Not self-discipline, busyness, stress?
No other excuses?
Keep pressing on me, Lord; keep the sorrow over disobedience strong in me. Let it move me to obedience so that all You have for me is closer for the receiving. I know that lovely and satisfying gifts await me with the faithful practice of small, sometimes monotonous, but always important habits.

12 comments:

Anna said...

We all struggle with obedience.
I have my cries in the shower too (and my quiet times with God too)!

Wanting What I Have said...

:) I appreciate you and your honesty. Thank you!

Traci Michele said...

So beautiful! O-b-e-d-i-e-n-c-e.... obedience is the very best way to show that we believe....

Now I have that song in my head....

Oh yes, this is what God desires of us...

such a struggle...

<3 you! Traci

jeana said...

He is with me on obedience and faithfulness too. Praying for you my friend.

Heather@Cultivated Lives said...

What a beautiful post - as usual. I am particularly struck by it because I felt like the two things that God's impressed upon my heart for the semester is obedience and habit. We've made radical changes to our schedule that were painful to make but he made it so clear that we were to do so...

...and now He's used YOU to once again impress on my heart the importance of these two and how closely they intertwine.

Heather@Cultivated Lives said...

Heather, we do a unit study curriculum called KONOS that is based around character traits. The character trait for the semester is obedience. HA. My kids need it and I'm becoming increasingly aware that I need it too. I feel His nudges, but the practical/self-reliant side wants to wait and see if that really 'makes sense' to do... As I teach my children to heed His voice (and mine) and obey right away, I've been convicted.

God's led us to cut almost everything out of our schedule. I've struggled with daily habits because we like to run out and 'do things' so much. We cut our music class, co-op and I felt God's clear nudging to give up my Bible study. My Thursday morning Bible study has been like a breath of fresh air. I love the accountability to stay in the Word and the chance to talk with others about it. It was quite a shocker when He asked me to give that up. As I fretted about remaining steady in the Word, He reminded me of the importance of habit and obedience. Taking time at home to really help my children practice the habit of obedience was what we were supposed to do.

He is faithful and I've had sweet communion with Him as I work on memorizing Colossians. There is accountability since so many others are choosing to do it this year, but it isn't taking time away from my children and our important season of habit training.

So thank you for being iron sharpening iron for me!

My Bright Corner said...

Yay...I found your blog again!

I loved this post. I went through a painful time of learning obedience, too, recently. Of course**, I haven't mastered it completely but it was such a difficult time. It reminded me why we teach children to learn to OBEY...so it's not such a struggle to obey the Heavenly Father when they're older.

Have a great night!

Rebecca

Julze said...

awww..may the Lord bless you and strengthen you as you cry out to Him

The Lord speaks to me when I am gardening. :-)

(((hugs)))...from Julia

Gloria (The Little Red House with the White Porch) said...

Greetings -- I wanted to comment to let you know that you already have a lot of obedience, my dear... You 'do' your obedience by just 'being' -- meaning by living your everyday life of being a good person, taking care of your kids, teaching them to do the right thing, taking care of your husband, etc., that's where you are obeying God and performing obedience. You certainly do NOT have to consider that you are being disobedient because you feel you need better regular habits of taking care of the house, spending less money, doing regular daily chores, etc. If stuff like this is what you struggle with, it's not disobedience. Do you know that THAT is?? It's called LIFE, your personality, and one of your crosses to bear in life. We all have our individual personal struggles/crosses. The good Lord doesn't care if you do your regular habits. He cares if you do your "good spiritual habits" and all you have to do is look at your kids and you will know if you are accomplishing that. Or look at a friend and know that you gave your best to be there for her when she needed you. Hey, I, too, struggle with the same problem as you do: improving my daily habits! For me: I pray to God to give me the gumption to get up and do what I need to start, or get up and do what I need to finish! But that's when I usually stop and say, "God, I'm just gonna STOP right here and instead of feeling sorry for myself and beggin You for help, I'm going to think positively and think of all that I DO have, be grateful for all I have and all that You have allowed me to have. And so I thank you." So yes, I still need help with my daily habits. But it's up to US to reach down and get up our gumption, THEN God will help us. So give yourself a break. As my father always said: The Good Lord Provides. And don't worry, He will take care of everything you need and take away your distress too. Hey! I'm sorry for this long comment!! But I am your newest Follower now, so that's one good thing, no? ;)
Best regards and blessings,
Gloria

Gloria (The Little Red House with the White Porch) said...

P.S. I hope that comment made sense that I wrote... I should have re-read it carefully before I sent it off!
gv

Debra said...

Heather, those waves of helplessness washing over us are what attract Him most, for it is in our weaknesses that His strength is made perfect.
Your struggle is common to all followers of Christ. Romans 7:15 says, “ I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.” Know that His grace is always sufficient.

Heather said...

You all are such a blessing to me!
I love each of your comments and glean something different from them. I love how some of you can relate and how some of you are just here to encourage. Wow, the community of believers is so very important.
Thank you!