Day Twenty-Nine: Is There Anyone Out There?

Is there anyone out there whose laundry is over-flowing

Is there marker on the walls that got there 

without you knowing?

Do you make dinners that your children push away

Do you shove stuff in closets 

When company comes to stay?

Is there anyone out there who can't find her keys

Who reminds her child a thousand times 

You must say, "thank you" and "please"?

If anyone is out there who can relate to these few woes

Rest assured you're among many

Moms who aren't always on their toes.

But it doesn't matter, dear Momma, because

Under chaos and frustration

Abides deep love.

Kissing knees and late night talks are worth the moment taken

Because little ones grow up and please

Don't ever be mistaken.

If there is anyone out there who feels overwhelmed today

Let two important goals be her guide:

Hug your babies and pray!

                                                             by: Heather Vanderkruk

 

Disruptive

 

Kids crunch and slide and skiff on snow,

Scream and squawk and slip below

Escarpment's crust.

 

I listen for the blue jay's cry,

Woodpecker's scarlet I squint to spy,

But they unconsciously disrupt.

 

I raise my specs toward limb and branch,

"Caw" and powdery dust, evidence,

But it's gone with a squeal from behind.

 

I spin around, retreat in loss.

Forthcoming days birds and I will cross 

Quiet paths, when children mind.

 

Disappointed in my lack of treasure,

But by what standard had I measured

That which brings delight?

 

With laughter and breathless wonder

Children clomp heavy to their mother,

Who embraces richest prize!

 

By: Heather Vanderkruk

 

I don't know what I'm thinking when I take those kiddos birding with me. What I do know is that at the end of every noisy, frustrating, bird-less hike, I learn what my real prize is... them :) 

Day Twenty: Patience In Homeschooling

"I'm going straight into that principal's office tomorrow and signing you up immediately! If you're going to disrespect me as your teacher one more time, I will have no other choice. Try that at school and see what happens! They won't take kindly to all that mouthiness, I promise you!" I raged, looming over her with hands on my hips.

 

My girl stood with big brown eyes like saucers, confounded by the sight before her. She was suddenly quiet as she gazed upon her mother having the same tantrum she had just displayed. Her shoulders slumped and she looked down at the floor. "I don't want to go to school, Mommy," she cried.

 

My muscles loosened and I sighed. In that moment, I realized I had lost my patience over a ready bomb that could have been deactivated in a much different way. Shame crept over me as every moment I had lost my cool raced through my mind. I pulled her toward me and wrapped my arms around her. "I love teaching you, Babe, I really do. I just want you to remember to honour Mommy, as the Bible says, and obey the rules of our homeschool. Will you forgive me for being so impatient?" Through her tears she gazed up at me, still frowning.

 

"Okay (sniff)." And she buried her head in my sweater.

 

Patience is a daily request I make to the Lord. But because His Spirit is resident in me, and He is all-patient, I have the ability to exhibit patience to my children. I am not helpless. I am not left without a way out of the temptation to lose it. (I Corinthians 10:13) I am responsible, and capable, to obey and be long-suffering as Jesus exemplified. He said, "If you love Me, keep My commandments." (John 14:15, 16) Thankfully, when I fail, the Holy Spirit rescues me every time as He is my "Helper". He knows my heart and that I desperately desire to raise my children experiencing this beautiful fruit of the Spirit in me. I want a soft answer to be so normal in our home that they are surprised when they see impatient behaviour. (Proverbs 15:1) I know that my greatest weapon against impatience is communing daily with the Giver of this fruit. (Psalm 27--amazing! Galatians 5:25) I see such a difference in my responses to my children and husband when I do.

 

 

After posting yesterday's writing about roadblocks to homeschooling, I thought about how impatience is likely the next biggest concern for mothers. They fear they won't have enough patience to deal with their children by educating them and being with them all day long. Well, they're absolutely correct--they won't, and I don't either. However, just as we rely on God to provide financially and to turn the hearts of our husbands, we trust that if He's leading us to this calling, He'll provide the patience when we ask. It doesn't mean we won't make mistakes, but we will grow in Him and get a little closer to the way His Son lived and was an example for us. Psalm 103 speaks of God's great long-suffering with us and that He doesn't punish us according to what we deserve. Since patience is directly related to mercy and we have been shown unfathomable mercy in our lives, we remind ourselves that we must have mercy on our children when they are behaving or learning in way that is frustrating to us. We have the ability to have patience in our homeschooling when God is the One who leads us.

 

 

Gratitude:

 

1514. for the unbelievable mercy God grants me each day

1515. the news Linda received that the plate in her head will be operated on to be fixed

1516. that Kim began her treatments and is on the road to healing (believing!)

1517. for another birthday for my two January kiddos!

1518. for a continued love of homeschooling even in our eighth year

1519. for the readers of this blog who let me know once in awhile that they're "tuned in"--thank you!

1520. how gratitude really does change hearts and minds and bring joy to your life

1521. for intimate conversations with my big girl
1522. how he often says out of the blue, "I love you, Mommy."

 

 

Sunday Morning Chaos

I'm happy and I'm sneaking quietly to the shower to get a head start. I've laid out the children's church clothes the night before and I feel good about my timing. Ah, the silence. I think about the fact that I may actually get to blow-dry my hair this time, that I may even be able to apply makeup before we leave the house. I realize that a cup of tea will have to be "to-go" but that's okay because I'm prepared in all other areas.

But somehow, the morning gets away from me and while I'm ironing the forgotten item and one child lies sleepily on the stairs and one is in a puddle of tears over not being able to find her other shoe, I sigh in dismay. My husband, who is trying to pull a shirt over a child's yawning face, is looking at his watch and calling for everyone to get into the van or he will be late for choir. I try to brush through the matted nest of my daughter's hair, as she cries like a wounded seal. My son is playing "drums" with the bananas we're taking with us for our breakfast-on-the-run and my mood is becoming less and less cordial.

Finally, we manage to get to the back door and someone lets the cat out. We tumble out of the house, now engaged in a game of chase-the-indoor-cat-who-longs-to-be-free and I'm exasperated. I set the alarm and lock the door, jump into the van, tearing my pantyhose, only to find out there's still one child in the house and I've locked her in. I'm muttering under my breath to my husband and I'm raising my voice to the three other children to "Get buckled!".

Our drive is not as joyful as I had hoped and while I try not to stab myself with my eyeliner, someone tattles that someone else has worn running shoes with her fancy dress and that so-and-so forgot to brush their teeth. I give up.

After dropping the four children off at Sunday School with forced smiles, hugs and kisses, I arrive breathless in the sanctuary where, obviously, the Holy Spirit has already shown up. I know this because I immediately want to cry. I feel His presence and I long for His comfort. For some reason, I'm resistant to Him and try to enter into the worship time pretending to be at peace. I catch my husband's eye from his choir row on the platform and I lose it. Tears come and I gush my need to the Lord for cleansing and renewal. He immediately responds and I'm swept away by his beckoning.

Grace on Sundays... it replaces the chaos for peace and offers forgiveness to accepting hearts. (#531)

532. for weekend success in homeschool organization (sometimes works and sometimes doesn't... this weekend I'm so prepared--now pray for me--ha ha!)

533. for our new contemporary evening services that send us home with solid, powerful teaching

534. for the advent season

535. for excited children who love their many, many Christmas program practices

536. for quick downpours--love them!

537. for scarves, mittens and colourful tights

538. for canvas prints

539. for how my children play "Helen Keller" every day :)

540. for my Christmas schedule I'm mapping out to avoid the mall this season