Day Twelve: Spend Time With Your Spouse

The last kiddo traipses down the stairs and Terry and I shoot the same look of relief at each other. It's been a long day and I slip under the afghan with him in front of the fire. We find a movie, preferably, one that will satisfy both of us, and snuggle in for the remainder of the evening.

We began dating in 1989 and haven't stopped. We make sure we have alone time and we get out of the house, even just to grab tea and coffee or fly his remote-control plane. I bring my camera to photograph birds and we quietly hang out together. It's a necessary and beautiful thing we have going but it wasn't without its road blocks. Conflict between us years ago, babies up in the night, careers for both of us, and sheer exhaustion gobbled us up at times. But, we remained true to our goal to celebrate us as a couple and that has made all the difference. The Lord, protected us and we desire to honour Him in our marriage. Serving each other is the key because that's what God told us to do in His Word. Amazing how giving yourself away in service to your spouse most often means you get the same in return! It took us a lot of time to figure this out, but we're getting it.

 

How does this relate to homeschooling? It relates in every way. Our togetherness affects the disciplining of our children, agreeing on how much to spend on curriculum, the security of our kids knowing that their parents are in love, and the strength we need because this journey is sometimes frustrating and overwhelming. I encourage you, friends, to remember who came first in your life and who is the one you will complete your life with. Your children will actually prosper when you place your spouse before them.

 

(My post on our school room will be tomorrow instead of today. I miscalculated with a birthday party in there and didn't have time to photograph it today :)

Sunday Morning Chaos

I'm happy and I'm sneaking quietly to the shower to get a head start. I've laid out the children's church clothes the night before and I feel good about my timing. Ah, the silence. I think about the fact that I may actually get to blow-dry my hair this time, that I may even be able to apply makeup before we leave the house. I realize that a cup of tea will have to be "to-go" but that's okay because I'm prepared in all other areas.

But somehow, the morning gets away from me and while I'm ironing the forgotten item and one child lies sleepily on the stairs and one is in a puddle of tears over not being able to find her other shoe, I sigh in dismay. My husband, who is trying to pull a shirt over a child's yawning face, is looking at his watch and calling for everyone to get into the van or he will be late for choir. I try to brush through the matted nest of my daughter's hair, as she cries like a wounded seal. My son is playing "drums" with the bananas we're taking with us for our breakfast-on-the-run and my mood is becoming less and less cordial.

Finally, we manage to get to the back door and someone lets the cat out. We tumble out of the house, now engaged in a game of chase-the-indoor-cat-who-longs-to-be-free and I'm exasperated. I set the alarm and lock the door, jump into the van, tearing my pantyhose, only to find out there's still one child in the house and I've locked her in. I'm muttering under my breath to my husband and I'm raising my voice to the three other children to "Get buckled!".

Our drive is not as joyful as I had hoped and while I try not to stab myself with my eyeliner, someone tattles that someone else has worn running shoes with her fancy dress and that so-and-so forgot to brush their teeth. I give up.

After dropping the four children off at Sunday School with forced smiles, hugs and kisses, I arrive breathless in the sanctuary where, obviously, the Holy Spirit has already shown up. I know this because I immediately want to cry. I feel His presence and I long for His comfort. For some reason, I'm resistant to Him and try to enter into the worship time pretending to be at peace. I catch my husband's eye from his choir row on the platform and I lose it. Tears come and I gush my need to the Lord for cleansing and renewal. He immediately responds and I'm swept away by his beckoning.

Grace on Sundays... it replaces the chaos for peace and offers forgiveness to accepting hearts. (#531)

532. for weekend success in homeschool organization (sometimes works and sometimes doesn't... this weekend I'm so prepared--now pray for me--ha ha!)

533. for our new contemporary evening services that send us home with solid, powerful teaching

534. for the advent season

535. for excited children who love their many, many Christmas program practices

536. for quick downpours--love them!

537. for scarves, mittens and colourful tights

538. for canvas prints

539. for how my children play "Helen Keller" every day :)

540. for my Christmas schedule I'm mapping out to avoid the mall this season

Big Fat Fight

Ever have arguments with your spouse where you walk away feeling less proud of yourself than when you first entered into the boxing ring? This song, by Sara Groves, always reminds me that we can allow a heated moment to throw off a beautiful day. You can listen to the song here, but reading the lyrics is sometimes more powerful for me (see below).

Ter, I'm sorry for pushing about something so petty. I could have stopped it and I want you to read that I think you're the coolest dude I know. xo

It's Me

weather came and caught us off our guard
we were just laughing and feelin' alright
had such a great time just last night
we walked into a minefield undetected
you took a tone and I took offense
anger replacing all common sense

oh run for you life
all tenderness is gone
in the blink of an eye
all goodwill has withdrawn
and we mark out our paces and
stare out from our faces
but baby you and I are gone gone gone

incomprehensible layers of isolation
now you're the man with a heart of stone
making me pay here by being alone
seemingly justified righteous indignation
now I'm the woman who holds all her pain
looking for somebody else to blame

we hold all the keys to our undoing
cutting me down in small degrees
you know my worst insecurities
I'm making no effort to understand
no one can hurt you like I can
deep down inside the girl's waking up
she's calling out to the boy she loves

it's me
oh baby it's me
how in the world can tenderness be gone
in the blink of an eye

the girl in me she's callin out
oh the girl in me she's callin out
to the boy in you
to the boy in you

baby come back
baby come back to me

Home Again

He's home again. After a well-deserved golf trip, I get him back. In keeping with our long history, I found a letter under my pillow the night he left and I received phone calls and emails every day. Absence certainly does make the heart grow fonder. Life can resume as normal... and... Mommy gets a little break too. Yay! pancakes for breakfast :) Thank You Lord, for safe traveling for my Beloved.