Thursday, July 23, 2009


Partially completed tasks. Things left undone. It's easy for discouragement to set in when I feel like I don't have time for all the work I must accomplish before day's end. In the past, I've based my worth on how many items I was able to check off my list, but now, I'm seeking a greater plan.

Early in the year, God gave me the word, "Adonai", through my devotional readings, as my word for the year. I looked it up and thought it was interesting and would pray to God as, "Adonai" to be sure to use the name He revealed to me.
The name means, "Lord" or "Master" and I felt that God obviously was sharing how He wanted me to view Him. I claimed Him to be my Lord and merrily went on with my day.

I became more and more discouraged as dishes piled up, kids didn't get their schoolwork done, I didn't have time to call that friend in need, and I wasn't always spending the quiet time with God that I desired.

Finally, I learned that when He says He desires to be Lord of my life, He means in every area. Suddenly, just calling Him Master or worshipping Him as Lord was not enough. I realized that a servant does what her master asks, without questioning his requests. Often, the servant only sees part of the picture but the master knows the end goal.

So, knowing what His Word says about Him, that He's slow to anger, has plans for my life, wants to pour out His blessings on me, disciplines me when I stray, and is unchangeable, I can give Him my day's agenda. In the early hours of the day (not too early!) I ask Him to make my checklist. Does He audibly tell me what to do? No, but I feel a sense of peace when I offer Him my day and all my goals. If I'm listening, He begins to sift them like flour and reveals what is important and what is not so urgent.

Control. That's a tough one for me. I'd like to have full control of everything in my life, but that's not how God's designed me. He wants me to rely on Him and others so that I don't become too independent or proud. These characteristics actually are a detriment to me. I should know, I've struggled with both!

Today, as I was driving, the Lord revealed to me the fact that I was stewing about something. Since He's convicted me of stewing in the past, I immediately confessed this. He desires to hear my thoughts, my fears, my anxieties so I can leave them at His feet. He alone can take care of them anyway. What a relief! All the mental fiddling in the world will not accomplish anything. This only creates a snowball effect in my mind which makes the situation larger than reality. The sheer obedience of handing over the control is what is going to free me and eventually solve the problem. He always sends an answer when I finally let go.

In giving my day, my thoughts, and all that is left undone to Him, I release myself of burden, guilt, and wasted time. Would you, dear friends, continually remind me of this? Thanks.

Master and Lord, daily You find me giving back control because I seem to want to solve my own problems and create my own agenda. I often fail. Your servant is listening and desires to follow Your ways. (Give Mama a big hug for me on her earthly birthday!).

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Dearest Heather: the beauty in your thoughts and writings, astound even me. Your photo-journalism is amazing, too! You seem to have the same thoughts and struggles as I, except you have figured them out and put them in order. Thank you for helping this Grandma continue to walk with GOD. I love you! Mom xo