Home Again

He's home again. After a well-deserved golf trip, I get him back. In keeping with our long history, I found a letter under my pillow the night he left and I received phone calls and emails every day. Absence certainly does make the heart grow fonder. Life can resume as normal... and... Mommy gets a little break too. Yay! pancakes for breakfast :) Thank You Lord, for safe traveling for my Beloved.

Small Ones Loving Smaller Ones

If there's one thing that can make us all melt into mushy puddles of love, it's kittens. My sister has a hobby farm and we just can't take the sweetness of the kittens. It's fun to visit the other animals but there seems to be a draw to these tiny balls of fur that scamper all over the yard before they look big enough to walk. I want to photograph all of them! I found this little white one in the top of the barn sitting in the warmth of the sun that was shining through the upper window. I just wanted to squeeze it. This is how we ended up with Clementine, who is our little dolly at home. Two of us are even mildly allergic to her but we suffer through it. My sister laughs at us when we spend money on her or coddle her--one of so many litters of barn cats. My children are simply showering affection on one of God's creatures and growing in responsibility and compassion at the same time.

Hiding His Word In Her Little Heart

We're ALL hiding His Word in our hearts! (Psalm 119:11)

Four year-old Emily reciting Psalm 23.

Hanging Out Your Dirty Laundry

No one wants people to know their dirty little secrets. No one wants anyone to know they have a dark side. No one wants to come down from their pedestal and admit they are a coward, a fool, a sinner. No one wants this until... they experience godly sorrow. If you've received this gift from the Lord, you'll know what I'm talking about. Godly sorrow is true repentance, a deep and utter grief that you are faced with when you realize how you've broken the heart of God. It's a sick feeling that comes when you are enlightened to the magnitude of your sin and it's effect on yourself and others around you--even in unassuming ways. It's the shame you discover when you finally see the hypocrite you've become. It's the urgent desire to snatch others from the enemy's hands--and quickly.

Hanging out your dirty laundry is not always necessary in full, but when you have been humbled by godly sorrow you will have so little pride, that the foremost thought you will have is to share with others that you aren't as righteous as the facade you've purported. The exposure of your weaknesses is key to helping others see the truth and that the Truth will set them free as well! You will strongly desire to shout from the mountain tops that taking thoughts captive to the obedience of Christ and bringing sin into the light removes all of that sin's power! Oh, it's difficult, at first, even scary, but there's no better place than to be walking in the light. Joy, peace and freedom can belong to you when you take the mask off and begin to allow God to deal with your "dirty laundry".

Once this has happened, you can walk without shame and begin with a "clean slate". Asking the Lord for an accountability partner will also be the staying power you need to maintain your walk in freedom. He will send someone in due time whom you can trust. The Bible says, "Therefore, confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed..." James 5:16

Striking a Deal

My husband is a businessman. He takes his job seriously and even somehow sneaks deal-making into other areas of our life, for instance, the creation of Duplo block towers. Thankfully, my son is the cautious type and does not fall for these deals hook, line and sinker. He methodically weighs the options and often says, "No Daddy". He's actually learning business sense by this building and trading. It's one of the many ways my husband is training him in "the way he should go". It seems like small preparation but every minute of quality time is vital to our children's future. It's a good thing learning can be so fun :)

Joy Medicine

Living with His joy is the medicine for depression. Do we have to be diagnosed to have "gray days"? No, we all suffer, don't we? Ann Voskamp shares today how to break free of the demons by being thankful. And so, with gratitude, I continue my list...

70. for creature-seekers

71. for leaf-rompers

72. for yearly pleasures we can count on

73. for "new" big girls :)

74. for creature-instinct and intelligence (check out that architecture!)

75. for "the last of the Queen Anne's Lace for the summer" (Anne of Green Gables)

76. for cascading falls (right on my in-laws property--so blessed)

77. prickly things turned soft and beautiful

(keep working on me, Lord!)

78. all things red

79. light--anywhere (His light, revealing the darkness and removing blinders)
80. our nature walks rank high in my list of gratitude

81. jumper cables

82. visits from old friends

83. while-you-were-out projects

84. laundry (did I honestly just type that?) -speaking words of life here!

85. Bible Study group

86. new revelations from familiar scriptures

87. encouraging Blogger friends--thanks :)

88. opportunities for prayer--bringing me to His feet

89. His grace when I don't go to His feet

90. a crafty mom who's always thinking of her grandchildren

91. friends in far-away places--I miss you

"...a garment of praise, instead of a spirit of despair." (Isaiah 61:3b)

I Want It

I want a heart change. I want to be wise. I want my eyes to be enlightened. I want sweet things in my life. I want great rewards. I want to be cleansed. I want to be innocent.

Psalm 19 tells me I can have it all! All of those things!

Read God's word and discover what's yours for the taking!

Praise Him!

My husband and I watched "Facing the Giants" last week and I am preparing for rain. If you don't know what this means, rent the movie and be changed by the testimony of a man who found God's word to be true.

Stitches of Love

It's that time again. The cool weather seems to bring out the crafty side of us. We add in more art and more handiwork in late fall and winter than the rest of the year. Last winter, Meghan practiced her knitting skills which Mama had taught her while she was still with us. I have photos to remember this--a great blessing. This year, Meghan shared her love for knitting with her sister, Molly, who is thrilled to find she picked up the skill quite easily. Emily, of course, would like to be a part of the big girls' knitting club and so I began a tiny square for her, explaining that knitting isn't always simple for little fingers. Not several minutes later, she held it out from her body, remarking that she was done with all this. Perhaps next year.

Our goal last year was to knit enough squares to make a blanket for a homeless person, through the organization, "Blankets for Canada". Since we needed a little more practice, we're hoping to try again. Please check out their website and be inspired and if you're from the U.S., maybe there's something you can do in your area as well!

http://www.blankets4canada.ca/

Remembering the Vision

"These people must be Christians; it says, 'Jesus' EVERYWHERE in here!" Molly exclaimed these words as we walked around a little Mennonite bookstore in Wellesley the other day. Teaching them to recognize who they are in Christ, how to spot others with the same lifesong, and boldly share their love for Jesus, is part of our family's vision. What's yours? Do your children know it?

As we stood for our moment of silence this morning, we remembered not only what our soldiers did for us (and are doing), but what our Saviour did for us. The questions were abundant and I felt so thankful to be homeschooling. I had the opportunity to impart our vision through Remembrance Day ceremonies.

In the midst of math, shopping, obligations, etc., I have a mission field here at home. I try to remember this daily; remember that I've been given four little lives in which to plant a vision so mighty that it will affect the future of our world.

" Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13

The Sibling System

They argue and tattle and scuffle now and then, but these siblings, little offspring of mine, know how to connect with one another. When left to themselves, they will organize a game or playtime that leaves me smiling with awe. They create a system that works well and everyone is satisfied. Meghan, the oldest, usually decides how this is all going to play out. Today, she figures, all the vehicles need "gassing up" and her sisters and brother think this is a fantastic idea.

She knows how each member of the sibling team is going to feel, given their particular role in the system of play. If she's in the mood, she implements this perfectly and everyone is happy. This is truly what training them up is all about. As my oldest grows, using her knowledge in this area becomes a choice of obedience. The others, are also learning how to become leaders, but for now, they follow by example. Sharing, cooperating and humbly stepping aside for another person's benefit, are qualities we are practicing. Some days, there's little evidence of this! But by God's grace, we carry on and each day the sibling system is becoming one in which they will draw upon as they relate to and function in the world.

Beauty in the Broken

Looking forward to the "Beauty Challenge" put forth by Ann Voskamp at A Holy Experience, I gathered bits of His creation to display in empty vessels. I treasure the vessels as they are each a gift or an heirloom. I prepared my ladder to hold the gifts not bought, but found and I carefully chose icons of autumn.

Without my knowledge, little hands, with enthusiasm to help, watered and rearranged. I encountered a puddly mess and detached pieces of china by chubby fingers, that didn't expect their own strength. Searching for gentle words when my thoughts were not so gentle, God lovingly chided, "There's beauty in the broken". My mind immediately delivered the message to my mouth and I soothed without anger.

Hours later, as He often does, the Lord washed His ways over me and I began to recall how dashed and broken pieces in my life had woven a more beautiful spirit in me. Would I be where I am today without the brokenness? I shudder at the thought. And so, this Monday of counting blessings, I add pain to my list, for it is only in the experience of anguish, that we can fully know His comfort, His healing, and His beauty in it all.

Lord, fill me, an empty vessel, however You desire, to make me more beautiful to You.

A Little Bread With That Peanut Butter?

I walked into the kitchen yesterday to find more growing up happening before my eyes. Why is it that my children long for independence this early? I'm quite happy to make a peanut butter sandwich for this little guy of mine but he insists on taking matters into his own hands. How he gets onto the counter is a feat on it's own (Note to self: this level is no longer safe for storing all off-limits items!). So upon assessing the situation, I see that my cautious boy does remember that plastic knives are for two year olds, however, licking them off is probably not a good idea. Clothes, apparently are made for wiping messy hands :) The evidence on Oliver's face also leads me to believe he's had his share of protein for the day. And as he returns the knife to dip again into the jar, it becomes obvious that one swipe of PB is for the bread and the next scoop is for his personal taste-testing.

Colours of Mercy

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; His mercies never come to an end. They are new every morning. Great is His faithfulness!

I know what you're thinking, but the photo is taken by my daughter while we were driving yesterday:)

Entering The World's Stage Left: A New Reader

She is beginning to feel like a reader. Oh, she could sound out words for a long time now but it wasn't until she opened a chapter book, that she knew her time had arrived. She realizes she's entered a new world of possibilities when piecing those once-foreign symbols together leads her on an adventure.

Yesterday, while Molly was reading aloud to me she exclaimed, "Oh! I just looove the words, 'he stopped' in stories! It means that something is coming... sometimes something scary!"

There's nothing so special for a homeschooling mom as the day when this love for reading "clicks". You hope for it, work for it, pray for it. You wonder if this child is the one who won't necessarily be just like you--an avid reader--but still, you pray. The goal for all children is to have the ability to read, and they all will. But the love of reading-- now that's a gift.

Drawing Close

"Draw near to God and He will draw near to you." James 4:8

"JESUS... JESUS"

It's the first word I purpose to leave my lips when I wake up. Whisper the Name above all names and watch how your day begins in your mind.

I found that my first thoughts were driving my next minutes, then hours. For a few months now, I've been practicing "drawing near" at first consciousness. I can only benefit. He meets with me and my inner struggle is quieted, my distraction is set on a straight path and my first love is narrowed to where it belongs.

The Third First Time

He doesn't likely remember what it was like to feel the leaves crunching under his feet, to hear the sound they make, to feel the excitement of the jump. He cannot articulate those memories anyway. What he does know is that this third autumn of his little life is like the first all over again. The utter joy of a sister showering him with leaves, another sister pushing him over the edge of the rock wall-him tumbling head first into the raked-high pile-releases a squeal that throws the rest of us into stitches! He doesn't likely remember and so he gobbles up the "new" experience with vigor.

Lord, let me savour each gift from you as my thirty-seventh first.

A Kid Was Here

My husband and I have a little phrase we use whenever we see something awkwardly out of place in our home: "A kid was here." It's not just for something that's untidy, but something that's in a very odd place. For example, we've seen, a tiny Polly Pocket doll climbing one of our plants, a tape measure in the fridge, Lego in the fruit bowl, toy cars in the pantry cupboard, and an open umbrella over the toilet. We always laugh and remind ourselves these years are fleeting.

I was taking photos around our home today and as I lifted my camera to get this particular shot, my husband said, "Wait, do you want me to move that ball out of the way?" I smiled and told him no. The shot is even more beautiful with that silly, partially deflated ball in it. He smiled too and together, we learn to cherish these small evidences of their childhood that will quickly fade.