The Scriptures that ran through my mind about the taming of the tongue and that whatever is in the heart comes out of the mouth... what I spoke aloud was not in my heart. But how I can quickly give way to carlessness without thinking. Worst of all, our neighbours were passing by, walking their dog, enjoying the sunshine. The deep desire and intent to be a witness to my neighbours--crushed.
But He met me in that place. Pulled me up out of my shame in disappointing Him, reminded me of His forgiveness, His love, regardless of my failures (Psalm 103:3, Psalm 139:17, Hebrews 4:15). Oh, the grace! And as He's teaching me, I am able to pass it on to my children. My daughter just confessed something she also was ashamed of saying yesterday. This morning, we shared in that grace together.
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Oh, the Grace!
Wilted, ashamed, defeated, I scolded myself for blowing it. Just when I thought I was doing so well...
The Lord has been wooing me, changing me, growing me. I've felt it in my bones, the way a warm blanket saturates the shivering. It wasn't a pride really, just a knowing that I was moving from a place of thoughtlessness to a place being Spirit-led.
But yesterday, I failed embarrassingly.