Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Oh, the Grace!

Wilted, ashamed, defeated, I scolded myself for blowing it. Just when I thought I was doing so well...
The Lord has been wooing me, changing me, growing me. I've felt it in my bones, the way a warm blanket saturates the shivering. It wasn't a pride really, just a knowing that I was moving from a place of thoughtlessness to a place being Spirit-led.
But yesterday, I failed embarrassingly.

The Scriptures that ran through my mind about the taming of the tongue and that whatever is in the heart comes out of the mouth... what I spoke aloud was not in my heart. But how I can quickly give way to carlessness without thinking. Worst of all, our neighbours were passing by, walking their dog, enjoying the sunshine. The deep desire and intent to be a witness to my neighbours--crushed.

But He met me in that place. Pulled me up out of my shame in disappointing Him, reminded me of His forgiveness, His love, regardless of my failures (Psalm 103:3, Psalm 139:17, Hebrews 4:15). Oh, the grace! And as He's teaching me, I am able to pass it on to my children. My daughter just confessed something she also was ashamed of saying yesterday. This morning, we shared in that grace together.

2 comments:

Annie said...

beautiful....honest...real....thank you for sharing...sniff
xo

sgm said...

Thank you for bearing your soul. I too had confessions to make today and ask for forgivenss. Oh the daily falling on our knees. Why do we fight it so?
Thanks for sharing your heart!